Sniping at Oscar | Miscellaneous Heathen

In which the Heathen provide commentary on the Academy’s nominations, or most of them, anyway. To Wit:

Best Picture

Good News: They finally noticed what Peter Jackson’s been doing.
Bad News: Seabiscuit’s on the list, too. Haven’t we heard enough about that goddamn horse already?

Best Director

Good News: Jackson scores again, and has three films to show for it — with no big nods thus far, it makes sense that they’ve held off until the final film.
Bad News: He’s against Sophia Coppola and Clint Eastwood.

Best Actor

Good News: In a surprise move, Johnny Depp gets the nod he’s deserved for years for his role in Pirates of the Caribbean.
Bad News: Sean Penn again?

Best Actress

Good News: Charlize Theron’s outstanding performance makes her nomination here a foregone conclusion.
Bad News: Charlize Theron’s role as a mass murdering hard-luck hooker makes it an awful big stretch to think the Academy will give her the statue she deserves.

Best Supporting Actor

Good News: Benicio Del Toro and Alec Baldwin are on the list.
Bad News: What the hell is wrong with any of Jackson’s cast? Where’s Sean Astin? Where’s Ian McKellen?

Best Supporting Actress

Good News: We’ll have to listen to some Hollywood type try to say “Aghdashloo” on stage in front of millions of people.
Bad News: Renee “Look! I can modulate my weight AND do an accent!” Zellweger will probably win.

Best Screenplay (Original)

Best Screenplay (Adaptation)

Good News: LOTR scores another (and, in this case, inevitable) nomination here.
Bad News: With a fantasy epic and a comic adaptation to choose from here, they may well play it safe and pick that goddamn horse again.

Cinematography

Bad News: Not to beat a drum here, but what the hell is wrong with these people? LOTR deserves at least a nomination here for sheer scope of film if nothing else.
More Bad News: That fucking horse is on this list, too.

Film Editing

Visual Effects

Good News: Lord of the Rings again, natch. Though the coolest effect was actually in the first movie; the Balrog is the scariest thing I’ve ever seen on film. (Not counting Charlize Theron, above.)
More Good News: Pirates of the Caribbean gets a deserved nod here, too.
Bad News: In a field 2/3 great, Wet-Russell-Crowe could walk away with it.

Art Direction

Good News: LOTR once again, for that tiny task of visualizing a whole world for the screen.
Bad News: It’s up against everyone’s favorite glue candidate, wet-Russell-Crowe, and Dances with Samurai, none of which feature the kiss-of-death aspects of magic, dragons, etc.

Costume Design

Makeup

Sound Mixing

Original Song