From The Onion, of course:

U.S. Capitol Cleaning Turns Up Long-Lost Constitution

WASHINGTON, DC÷Lost for nearly two years, the U.S. Constitution was found Tuesday behind a couch in the Governor’s Reception Room. “Wow, I forgot all about that thing,” said U.S. Sen. Chris Dodd (D-CT), who found the historic document while vacuuming. “Nobody knew what happened to it. Guess it must’ve fallen back there during a meeting.” After making the find, Dodd spent several minutes rereading some of his favorite old amendments.