Announcing Flo Control.

But I love McSweeney’s anyway.

How fast can you spank the monkey?

It’s coming back.

The Larson B ice shelf, an enormous floating extension of Antarctica, has broken up. When I say “enormous,” I mean REALLY REALLY BIG, like 1,250 square miles and 650 feet thick (which is roughly the same as Rhode Island, though right offhand I don’t know how thick Rhode Island is). It’s now basically free-floating icebergs of the absurdly large variety; one is about nine times the size of Singapore.

Coverage at Yahoo and the BBC.

Global warming? What’s that?

Spamradio. Text-to-speech never sounded so good.

Sony has produced a humanoid robot that walks on two legs, can handle uneven surfaces, and even get up on its own if it falls down. It can also recognize you, and have limited conversations. Not exactly C3P0, but definitely getting there.

The Jim Morrison Simulatron, brought to you by the good folks at Modern Humorist.

Thanks to Madam Kaldi, I think I’ve just found my new brand of toilet paper.

Squirrels!

Caribou-flavored condoms.

It’s my birthday.

National Geographic photographer Steve McCurry took what is widely believed to be the most recognizable photograph ever to appear in that magazine: the haunting portrait of a refugee Afghani girl that appeared on the cover in 1985. It’s the same shot that’s been bandied about lately as the face of worn-torn Afghanistan.

McCurry knew he had something special, but he didn’t have the one additional thing he really wanted: the girl’s name, or how to reach her. He’s made several trips to try and locate her, but with no success — and more than a few false leads — until now.

The girl’s name is Sharbat Gula — though “girl” is wrong, as she’s now married, a mother, and about 30. McCurry has arranged for both a trip to Mecca and the education of her children. National Geographic Explorer will air a special on his search this Friday. Cool.

NoGators Religion Correspondent Paige P. provides us with this lovely bit of instruction. Have a nice day.

Love her or hate her, most of us know who Ayn Rand was. She left her papers to a friend, who decided to donate all but two pages to the Library of Congress. The two pages in question? The first and last of her manuscript of The Fountainhead. The rest he shipped off to Washington as a gift to the Library. Nice enough, right? Well, the LOC decided it wanted all of the papers — so they sued him. Nice, guys.

When trends collide!

|*|Need some fancy new threads?

This evening, when watching television, I noticed two things that disturb me.

First, over the course of a about an hour, I saw ads for all three major American car companies. Of the three, only Chrysler actually appealed to quality. Ford was content with a “tradition of Ford” spot, and GM shamelessly wrapped itself in the flag with a spirit of America spot. I’m wildly annoyed by this. I’m convinced the US is capable of making a decent car, but it seems like only Chrysler is actually trying; witness the sloppy attempts of GM to participate in the sports sedan market with its butt-ugly Cadillac CTS — this from the folks who thought “Hey! A Cadillac pick-up truck” and called it a good idea.

The other thing: I just watched a fascinating dialog on the Middle East question that was both nuanced and interesting — and altogether free of bombast. Moreover, said dialog featured substantive contributions from both show host and guest. The show? Comedy Central’s Daily Show, which featured the New Yorker’s David Remnick as its guest this evening. A comedy show is the only place we can see discussion without some talking head going apo-goddamn-plectic over the sound of his own howling. Why is this? Contrast this with the softball handling Jay Leno gave Dick Cheney, and you’ll see what I mean.

Here’s an excellent rant on the state of the music industry and what the “O Brother” soundtrack’s Grammy success in the face of scant marketing support means.

NegativLand has a piece by producer Steve Albini on the economics of pop music — ie, who gets paid what — that may help paint a picture of just exactly how fucked up the whole scene is.

Between 1983 and 2000, the number of corporations that essentially control all US media dropped from 50 to 6. If that doesn’t disturb you, think on it some more.

This sequence of photos details a pretty stunning turn of events on a river involving a tugboat and a bridge.

So having one’s birthday on the 13th of a month is kinda cool. Some years, it’s also a Friday, which pretty much demands a large, dangerous party. After this year, though, I may wish it were some other day.

The fact that they feel it necessary to point out that they will have a “real doctor” on hand makes it even creepier.|*|

Gary Coleman Confidential.

Why Stick People are extinct.

Remember those inane anti-drug ads during the Super Bowl, and the absurdly oversimplistic full-page print ads that followed? The ones that suggest that a casual pot user is “supporting terrorism” by purchasing illegal drugs, all the while ignoring the fact that it is prohibition that creates the black market and its exhorbitant prices? There’s finally a counterpoint. (PDF)

This is a site based on the author’s grandfather’s photos, who was a sailor in the US Navy after World War I. Cool.

“ Man Stabbed with Swordfish” is probably the best headline I’ve read in a while. As if it weren’t already clear, the article notes that “both men were drunk, according to police.”

Not only is Fox airing a show called “Glutton Bowl” — something I was pretty sure was an Onion story at first, I don’t mind admitting — but these freaks also appear to have some sort of governing body.

Bill Maher suggests that it’s shows like this that really make the rest of the world hate us. He can’t be far wrong.

With all this talk about weapons of mass destruction, it’s more important than ever to know what to do in case we’re attacked.

The Village Voice is running a piece on the Ten Questions the Press Isn’t Asking. It’s worth your time.

Former literary it-girl and rising-star-cum-has-been Elizabeth Wurtzel has an interesting point of view on the events of September 11, and it seems to consist largely of irritation at the way the terrorists inconvenienced her personally.

Having read that, it’s almost hard to tell if it’s real, or more parody.|*|

Some CS grad students at Harvard have put a dartboard on the Internet.

Students for Orwell.

Illuminati invitation.

Okay, it’s this goat head, see? And then. . . oh, hell. Just look.

. . . then who is treating him?

The more politically plugged-in among you are probably already aware of the fight brewing over Shrub’s first big judicial nominee, but what you probably don’t know is that said nominee — Federal Judge Charles Pickering, up for the Court of Appeals — is my cousin. We’re not close, but we do see each other several times a year. This brings a new perspective to the whole confirmation battle scenario for me. Charles is a staunch Republican, and has certainly been active in the Mississippi GOP for years. He’s been on the Federal bench since 1990 — a position that, of course, also required Congressional approval. That time, it was unanimous.

It won’t be that way for the Court of Appeals. A movement is afoot, largely led by People for the American Way, to defeat his nomination for reasons that probably boil down to the fact that he’s a Republican, which strikes me as a poor way to pick judges. I certainly don’t agree with him politically, but by most accounts he’s been a fine and fair jurist. When the decidedly left-of-center Washington Post says it’s gotten needlessly mean, and that the charges of racism and worse are so much smoke and mirrors, well, you know something ugly is happening. Aside from this piece, the only other balanced material I’ve seen has been in the New York Times; today, there was a long article (registration required) on Charles’ minority support within Mississippi, which is also food for thought.|||||*|

I think I’ve put this on here before, but it’s just so damn cool I can’t help myself. Amazing.

…and now on the web. This is almost certainly not authorized by the D, but it’s funny as hell anyway. Not a safe work link, unless you’ve got headphones and nobody else can see your screen — or you work in a really, really cool place. (In which case we should talk.)

There is much to hate about the Houston Chronicle, but the fact that Waylon Jennings’ obituary was front page news on Thursday can make up for at least some of it. (Of course, I’m not linking to it because of one of the aformentioned reasons to hate them: archives are a fee-only deal.)

You’ve got to be kidding.

Making this for my brother and his fiance.

But you really need to know which Office Space character you are anyway. I’m gonna have to go ahead and ask you to come in on Saturday…

British Telecom is suing the whole Internet. No, really.

My brother (with beard) just got engaged to this woman, (left, with boogie lips; astute readers will note Senior NoGators Political Correspondent Willis at right) and we here at NoGators really couldn’t be happier about it. Send them well-wishes here.

Only if making flight so painful that no one is willing to do it counts as “secure.” Idiot airline hijinx prove that it’s faster to drive than fly — even cross country.

The Weekly World News has temporarily taken down its website. Go visit to find out why.

Snubbed by Shrub, other evil powers form their own Axes. (Called to our collective attention by NoGators Texas Counsel Thomas P.)

To all you Yankees: N. B. that this guy isn’t even American, let alone Southern.

Now this is my kind of tractor.

I just sort of wonder if the folks here ever get into rumbles with the folks over here. God, I hope so.|*|