Is it a rerun? We can’t tell.

We first encountered the tale of the Cement Cuddlers some years back, and were pretty certain we’d posted about it here, but vigorous grepping suggests not. Enjoy.

I had been thinking for a long time about making cement filled teddy bears. I wasn’t exactly sure why. At first it was just a perceptual curiosity I wanted to experience, and I wanted others to experience. I liked the idea of someone being handed what appeared to be a fluffy stuffed animal, only to have it go tearing through your relaxed fingers like a lead meteor.

The Christmas shopping season seemed an ideal time to get them on the shelves of Los Angeles toy stores, so late in November, members of the Los Angeles Cacophony Society gathered in my backyard to gut several dozen plush toys and replace their innards with Portland’s finest.

We called them, “Cement Cuddlers”.

Click through for the whole story. It’s brilliant.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Peace out, H-dawg. We know you be balancin’ mad books in heaven:

POYNETTE, WI—Foul play is suspected in the death of an accounts receivable supervisor for a regional office-supply company, sheriff’s deputies reported Tuesday.

Herbert F. Kornfeld, 34, was an alleged accounting gang leader considered by law enforcement to be a key player in a series of ongoing office worker turf wars. He was found dead Monday morning in the third-floor copy room of Midstate Office Supply, his employer of 12 years.

Sigh. Take a moment to read Kornfeld’s first major work, “Keep Your Fucking Shit Off My Desk.”

Brilliant AND enlightening!

Jeff points us to the law of Conservation of Ninjitsu, which is awesome:

In any martial arts fight, there is only a finite amount of ninjutsu available to each side in a given encounter. As a result, one ninja is a deadly threat, but an army of them are cannon fodder.

This can apply to Elite Adversaries other than ninjas; vampires, for example, are particularly susceptible to Conservation Of Ninjitsu, as are werewolves, Special Forces commandos, and Super Powered Robot Meter Maids. Zombies seem to be exempt from this; they’re mainly dangerous because they travel in packs.

Batman is smart

Check out his counsel to Robin over the years:

Robin: “Where’d you get a live fish, Batman?”
Batman: “The true crimefighter always carries everything he needs in his utility belt, Robin.”

There’s more, of course. It reminds us of something LawyerHeathen wrote on our dorm wall 15 or so years ago, also a quote from Batman: “It is difficult to think clearly when strapped to a printing press.”

Word.