What’s wrong with Wikipedia

We don’t know where this is from, but it’s funny as hell. (Click for full size.) He-man cartoon

(If you know, tell us, and we’ll provide proper attribution.) It’s from Penny Arcade, as we probably could have surmised had we bothered to read the copyright thing on the right. Thanks, Tom!

Bush, Translated

From this CNN piece:

  • “So, consistent with U.S. law and the Constitution, I authorized the interception of international communications of people with known links to al Qaeda and related terrorist organizations.” Translation: “I’m wholly ignorant and contemptuous of the Constitution and US law, and FISA be damned.”
  • “I’ve reauthorized this program more 30 times since the September 11 attacks and I intend to do so for so long as the nation faces a continuing threat from an enemy that wants to kill American citizens”. Translation: “Expect the NSA to be eavesdropping on American citizens forever.”
  • “My personal opinion is, it was a shameful act for someone to disclose this very important program in a time of war . . . The fact that we’re discussing this program is helping the enemy.” Translation: “I’m very upset that the press is finally doing its job with respect to examining and investigating the actions of the government, and, in so doing, acting as a check on the power thereof. Also, it’s utterly impossible that terrorist operatives might have assumed we were listening in anyway.”

We have displeased the television gods somehow

We thought we were about to watch a Law & Order rerun from the Tivo, but as it turns out, it’s some sort of Oak Ridge Boys Christmas Special, featuring occasional ice skating with Dorothy Hamill to the “no, we’re not dated at all” sounds of — and we’re not making this up — Mannheim Fucking Steamroller. It is apparently new, not a rerun.

It’s like Christmas Special Hell.

He broke the law, and he’s admitting it. Shouldn’t jail be next?

Via Atrios, we find these paragraphs from Digby:

Look, the problem here, again, is not one of just spying on Americans, as repulsively totalitarian as that is. It’s that the administration adopted John Yoo’s theory of presidential infallibility. But, of course, it wasn’t really John Yoo’s theory at all; it was Dick Cheney’s muse, Richard Nixon who said, “when the President does it, that means it’s not illegal.” This was not some off the cuff statement. It was based upon a serious constitutional theory — that the congress or the judiciary (and by inference the laws they promulgate and interpret) have no authority over an equal branch of government. The president, in the pursuit of his duties as president, is not subject to the laws. Citizens can offer their judgment of his performance every four years at the ballot box.

The problem with this “theory” is that in our republic, no one is above the law. Not even Bush.

Update: Links fixed. Oops.

Ah, PATRIOTism

Tell me again how enhanced surveillance powers don’t automatically lead to bullshit like this. Precis: college senior requests the “Little Red Book” via interlibrary loan for a paper on communism and is visited by Feds as a result. Watch what you read, kid.

THIS is what Bush wants for America. You can put a crisis face on it by chanting “9/11! 9/11! 9/11!” over and over, but that just makes it more Orwellian. Next week? Two Minutes Hate!

Here they come again

Those Hollywood jackasses are at it again, and Congress is behaving like a wholly owned subsidary of the MPAA. The House Judiciary Committee has introduced legislation that would effectively kill the “analog hole,” fair use be damned. In other words, they want any piece of electronics that can play or copy something being played to pay attention to some special watermarking scheme that keeps copies from being made. Want to dub that CD to tape? Not anymore.

Techdirt has a great roundup of links on this.

Damn right.

Via Atrios again, this fine bit from the Washington Monthly site, concerning the extralegal domestic surveilance Bush ordered the military and NSA to do:

This is against the law. I have put references to the relevant statute below the fold; the brief version is: the law forbids warrantless surveillance of US citizens, and it provides procedures to be followed in emergencies that do not leave enough time for federal agents to get a warrant. If the NY Times report is correct, the government did not follow these procedures. It therefore acted illegally. Bush’s order is arguably unconstitutional as well: it seems to violate the fourth amendment, and it certainly violates the requirement (Article II, sec. 3) that the President “shall take Care that the Laws be faithfully executed.” I am normally extremely wary of talking about impeachment. I think that impeachment is a trauma for the country, and that it should only be considered in extreme cases. Moreover, I think that the fact that Clinton was impeached raises the bar as far as impeaching Bush: two traumas in a row is really not good for the country, and even though my reluctance to go through a second impeachment benefits the very Republicans who needlessly inflicted the first on us, I don’t care. It’s bad for the country, and that matters most. But I have a high bar, not a nonexistent one. And for a President to order violations of the law meets my criteria for impeachment. This is exactly what got Nixon in trouble: he ordered his subordinates to obstruct justice. To the extent that the two cases differ, the differences make what Bush did worse: after all, it’s not as though warrants are hard to get, or the law makes no provision for emergencies. Bush could have followed the law had he wanted to. He chose to set it aside. And this is something that no American should tolerate. We claim to have a government of laws, not of men. That claim means nothing if we are not prepared to act when a President (or anyone else) places himself above the law. If the New York Times report is true, then Bush should be impeached.

Update: Rep. Miller (D-CA) agrees.

Just how far will we let them go before we reclaim our country?

Via Atrios, we point you to this NYT story:

WASHINGTON, Dec. 15 – Months after the Sept. 11 attacks, President Bush secretly authorized the National Security Agency to eavesdrop on Americans and others inside the United States to search for evidence of terrorist activity without the court-approved warrants ordinarily required for domestic spying, according to government officials. Under a presidential order signed in 2002, the intelligence agency has monitored the international telephone calls and international e-mail messages of hundreds, perhaps thousands, of people inside the United States without warrants over the past three years in an effort to track possible “dirty numbers” linked to Al Qaeda, the officials said. The agency, they said, still seeks warrants to monitor entirely domestic communications. The previously undisclosed decision to permit some eavesdropping inside the country without court approval represents a major shift in American intelligence-gathering practices, particularly for the National Security Agency, whose mission is to spy on communications abroad. As a result, some officials familiar with the continuing operation have questioned whether the surveillance has stretched, if not crossed, constitutional limits on legal searches.

(N.B. that the John Yoo defending this surveillance in that story is the same John Yoo who, in his capacity as a DoJ lawyer, advised that the President need not comply with the Geneva Convention and could in fact act as he pleased with respect to torture, extraordinary rendition, and the indefinite detention of persons declared by the Executive to be “enemy combatants.” The values this guy exhibits in opinions like these are not American values, and they scare the bejesus out of me.)

The Post has more on this, and on the Administration’s justification for these actions:

The law governing clandestine surveillance in the United States, the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act, prohibits conducting electronic surveillance not authorized by statute. A government agent can try to avoid prosecution if he can show he was “engaged in the course of his official duties and the electronic surveillance was authorized by and conducted pursuant to a search warrant or court order of a court of competent jurisdiction,” according to the law. “This is as shocking a revelation as we have ever seen from the Bush administration,” said Martin, who has been sharply critical of the administration’s surveillance and detention policies. “It is, I believe, the first time a president has authorized government agencies to violate a specific criminal prohibition and eavesdrop on Americans.”

In which we discuss what comes after “Hrm, it’s a weird time for fireworks…”

So last night about 1230 we were lying in bed. Mrs Heathen was asleep. The cat was asleep. I was reading until I heard some very loud, sharp noises that most anyone would take for firecrackers, except New Year’s is weeks away, and firecrackers are not generally accompanied by the sound of breaking glass.

There’s an ugly sort of feeling in your gut that happens when you realize you’ve just heard a fairly serious exchange of small-arms fire — easily a dozen or more shots, quickly, in a way that meant more than one gun was involved — in the middle of the night that sounded close enough that you imagine you can smell cordite. Mrs Heathen woke up and looked at me as if to say “Um, those weren’t fireworks, were they?” We lay in the bed, very still, and listened, and in about thirty seconds I began to hear faint sirens, far off, but getting closer quickly.

Soon the sirens were damn near in our bedroom, and we could see the cruisers’ lights splashing against the buildings behind our house. I peeked out the front window to see a cop blocking West Drew and Taft; five or six more cars blew south down Taft, tearing off onto sidestreets. Then the helicopter showed up, flying low and slow, and playing a spotlight around the neighborhood.

This went on for some time. We soon remembered we hadn’t locked the backyard, which is of course precisely the sort of thing you want to remember in a situation like this. After a long time, it seemed, events outside calmed down enough that we drifted off back to sleep, but I’m pretty sure the cops were still roaming around when we did.

Turns out it was a drug sting gone bad; during a buy attempt, four dealers apparently decided to rob the undercover officers, who took exception thereto. An HPD officer is in the hospital; one of his assailants is dead, another in the hospital, and the other two are in custody.

We’re so doomed it’s not even funny

The new FCC chairman Kevin Martin is busy bending over for the big telcos. Among his giveaways:

  • Suggesting that taxes on VOIP equipment are a good idea
  • He sees no reason to push for network neutrality rules

The Bells & their cronies would have strangled the Internet in its crib if they had realized what it was at the time; they’re doing their very best to kill it as an adult now. They cannot control or profit from a free Internet nearly so much as they can with a more domesticated version, so that’s what they’ll push for — and damn the consequences.

Developers to Java: Drop Dead

Well, not quite — but the rise of lightweight languages like Perl and PHP coupled with the Apache web server and robust yet free databases means the bloom is a bit off the rose for Sun’s flagship technology. The recent explosion of tools like Ruby on Rails and AJAX just mean fewer and fewer projects end up using big, bulky, slow Java on the web, and we all know how painful Java on the client can be. That Chandler is Java-based pretty much means I’ll never use it — it just can’t be fast enough.

Sure, my company is using it — but we started our development a year ago, and with a Java-focussed team we knew and trusted. If we had it to do over again, I feel sure we’d have built our product using one of the technologies listed above for much less cash.

We just love these guys

Prof. Felton explains why CD DRM leads to spyware:

So if you’re designing a CD DRM system based on active protection, you face two main technical problems:
  1. You have to get your software installed, even though the user doesn’t want it.
  2. Once your software is installed, you have to keep it from being uninstalled, even though the user wants it gone.
These are the same two technical problems that spyware designers face.

Dept. of Excellent Developments

The band My Morning Jacket will distribute unencumbered, uncopy-protected copies of their new record to fans who complain about Sony’s MediaMax bullshit: “It should have been enough that fans are annoyed,” [Mike Martinovich, MMJ’s manager] says. “But [MediaMax’s security problems] should be the final reason.” Nice job, guys. Now, if only the labels would get it, too.

Coins, or, Voluntary Story Problems

Mrs Heathen and I have a big-ass jar on our dresser into which we place our change nightly. It accumulates at a fairly rapid clip, so despite the jar’s size we end up redeeming it about twice a year. It’s usually between $250 and $300, depending on how full we let it get before we head to the Coinstar machine — which is a pretty clever thing, and a very savvy business model, we believe; they take a (fair) cut of the free money you’re bringing in, and you leave with 91% of the cash.

This whole thing got us wondering, however, on account of we’re powerful geeky: How close could we get to the value of the jar if we estimated based on the jar’s weight (adjusting for the weight of the empty jar, natch), the known individual weight of each denomination of coin, and the estimated distribution of American coinage?

Presumably, the biggest barriers to this would be (a) getting a good estimate of the distribution and (b) finding a precise enough scale, as coins are very, very light. With those in hand, the next obstacle would be distribution variance — i.e., how much does our household distribution differ from some national “normal” value?

Anyway, after turning in a mostly-full jar today ($297. plus 4 Sac dollars and a new nickle that Coinstar knows not what to make of), we discovered that the machine gives out its tally of denominations, so we figure we’ll use this for a jumping-off point:

Half Dollars 1 0.04% $0.50 0.17%
Quarters 867 30.91% $ 216.75 72.00%
Dimes 518 18.47% $ 51.80 17.21%
Nickles 346 12.34% $ 17.30 5.75%
Pennies 1069 38.11% $ 10.69 3.55%
Sac 4 0.14% $ 4.00 1.33%
Coin ttl 2805 $301.04

More on airline “security” and air marshall shootings

From Bruce Schneier, quoting Salon’s pilot columnist:

In the days ahead, you can expect sharp debate on whether the killing was justified, and whether the nation’s several thousand air marshals — their exact number is a tightly guarded secret — undergo sufficient training. How are they taught to deal with mentally ill individuals who might be unpredictable and unstable, but not necessarily dangerous? Are the rules of engagement overly aggressive? Those are fair questions, but not the most important ones. Wednesday’s incident fulfills what many of us predicted ever since the Federal Air Marshals Service was widely expanded following the 2001 terror attacks in New York, Pennsylvania and Washington: The first person killed by a sky marshal, whether through accident or misunderstanding, would not be a terrorist. In a lot of ways, Alpizar is the latest casualty of Sept. 11. He is not the victim of a trigger-happy federal marshal but of our own, now fully metastasized security mania.

Truth from TechDirt

In a post titled “Music Business Blames Apple Again,” TechDirt discusses once again that the music industry screwed. This time, it’s pointing out that they’re irritated with Apple for the iTunes Music Store’s continued flat-pricing model and, to a lesser extent, Apple’s unwillingness to allow other stores and devices to work with iTMS’ DRM scheme. Of course, they can’t pull out of iTMS, either, as it’s the biggest online music retailer by a long shot at this point (and is in fact bigger by volume than some physical outlets). The irony of the whole situation is that it’s the labels who gave Apple all this power in the first place by insisting their music be DRM’d:

There is something [the labels] can do — open up their own store, and sell unrestricted MP3 files at whatever price they want. iPods, and and pretty much any other digital music player, can play those files. The labels’ insistence on trying to control what people can do with the music they buy has gotten them into this mess, and it will take a reversal of that position to get them out.

Jackbooted Thugs On The March

Say you’re asleep in your house with your kid in the middle of the night, and some people bust in with paramilitary gear, and you — law-abiding, gun-owning citizen that you are — open fire on the intruders in an effort to protect yourself, your daughter, and your home. Say you kill one of the intruders. Why, where I live, they’d probably give you a slap on the back and buy you a beer.

You certainly wouldn’t expect to end up on death row, would you? Certainly not in Texas. Certainly not in the Mississippi I grew up in, either. Except, of course, if you’re black, and the intruders are dimwitted redneck cops storming the wrong home in search of a drug den, and the guy you killed is the white son of the chief of police. Then all bets are off, and you may well find yourself in a world of hurt. For example, you might be on death row.

Christ.

There are some things so irredeemably fucked that they transcend party politics, and this is one of them. It’s monstrous.

More on the case here; that blogger follows it pretty closely, so his top page is always a good place to go.

Remember that Justice Dept. redistricting kerfluffle?

Yeah, the Bushites have made sure it won’t happen again. From Talking Points Memo:

A week ago it was reported that Justice Department lawyers had concluded at the time that the DeLay redistricting plan of 2003 violated the Voting Right Act, but that senior DOJ officials overruled that finding and okayed DeLay’s plan anyway. Justice Department officials have now instituted a policy to assure this never happens again. They have, as reported in today’s Post, “barred staff attorneys from offering recommendations in major Voting Rights Act cases, marking a significant change in the procedures meant to insulate such decisions from politics.” It’s the Bush model: politics over expertise and/or law. Whether it’s at the Pentagon, the CIA, Justice or the EPA hardly matters. The formula is consistent throughout.