Their reaction to Obama’s speech is fucking priceless. (I’ve tinyurl’d the link because their URL contains much of the joke.)
Huckabee on Obama
He may be a raving nutbird fundie, but he’s a decent human being who actually listened to Obama’s speech, which seems to have annoyed Scarborough yesterday (quoted at Kos):
HUCKABEE: [Obama] made the point, and I think it’s a valid one, that you can’t hold the candidate responsible for everything that people around him may say or do. You just can’t. Whether it’s me, whether it’s Obama…anybody else. But he did distance himself from the very vitriolic statements.
Now, the second story. It’s interesting to me that there are some people on the left who are having to be very uncomfortable with what Louis Wright said, when they all were all over a Jerry Falwell, or anyone on the right who said things that they found very awkward and uncomfortable years ago. Many times those were statements lifted out of the context of a larger sermon. Sermons, after all, are rarely written word for word by pastors like Reverend Wright, who are delivering them extemporaneously, and caught up in the emotion of the moment. There are things that sometimes get said, that if you put them on paper and looked at them in print, you’d say “Well, I didn’t mean to say it quite like that.”
And later:
HUCKABEE: I don’t think we know. If this were October, I think it would have a dramatic impact. But it’s not October. It’s March. And I don’t believe that by the time we get to October, this is gonna be the defining issue of the campaign, and the reason that people vote.
And one other thing I think we’ve gotta remember. As easy as it is for those of us who are white, to look back and say “That’s a terrible statement!”…I grew up in a very segregated south. And I think that you have to cut some slack — and I’m gonna be probably the only Conservative in America who’s gonna say something like this, but I’m just tellin’ you — we’ve gotta cut some slack to people who grew up being called names, being told “you have to sit in the balcony when you go to the movie. You have to go to the back door to go into the restaurant. And you can’t sit out there with everyone else. There’s a separate waiting room in the doctor’s office. Here’s where you sit on the bus…” And you know what? Sometimes people do have a chip on their shoulder and resentment. And you have to just say, I probably would too. I probably would too. In fact, I may have had more of a chip on my shoulder had it been me.
I don’t care if you’ve seen it before. Watch it again.
Miles and Coltrane, “So What,” live in 1958:
Today’s Guest Corpse: Arthur C. Clarke
Sir Arthur C. Clarke, giant of science fiction, has died. He was 90. With him passes one of the last of the first wave of SF authors.
One perfect note about his passing: his official time of death is 1:30AM on March 19, 2008. As I write this, it is 5:40PM on March 18. Clarke lived in Sri Lanka, you see, but the upshot is this: Arthur Clarke managed to die in the future.
Well done, Sir Arthur, and Godspeed.
Dept. of Really Dumb Ideas
So, New Jersey is apparently evaluating Sequoia’s voting machines, and the corporate drones got wind the state might let Princeton prof and voting machine security expert Ed Felton examine them.
This, clearly, scared the bejesus out of said drones, so they sent Prof. Felton a threatening letter, which was of course immediately leaked to the web, and which as elicited a great deal of ridicule and comment. Techdirt has more.
YES WE CAN
Go and at least read Obama’s speech, even if you don’t watch the video. It is a profound document, perhaps the most significant such text since the civil rights movement. Senator Obama speaks to not just the red herring of his pastor’s most obnoxious remarks, but the anger and resentment that continue to characterize far too much of the racial dialog in this country — a country, he also notes, that is the only place a story like his could even begin to happen.
In the end, then, what is called for is nothing more, and nothing less, than what all the world’s great religions demand – that we do unto others as we would have them do unto us. Let us be our brother’s keeper, Scripture tells us. Let us be our sister’s keeper. Let us find that common stake we all have in one another, and let our politics reflect that spirit as well.
For we have a choice in this country. We can accept a politics that breeds division, and conflict, and cynicism. We can tackle race only as spectacle – as we did in the OJ trial – or in the wake of tragedy, as we did in the aftermath of Katrina – or as fodder for the nightly news. We can play Reverend Wright’s sermons on every channel, every day and talk about them from now until the election, and make the only question in this campaign whether or not the American people think that I somehow believe or sympathize with his most offensive words. We can pounce on some gaffe by a Hillary supporter as evidence that she’s playing the race card, or we can speculate on whether white men will all flock to John McCain in the general election regardless of his policies.
We can do that.
But if we do, I can tell you that in the next election, we’ll be talking about some other distraction. And then another one. And then another one. And nothing will change.
Later, he finished with the story of Ashley, a woman who organized for his campaign in South Carolina. As a child, Ashley’s mother’s illness plunged her family into poverty, and Ashley wanted to work to avoid that fate for other families:
Now Ashley might have made a different choice. Perhaps somebody told her along the way that the source of her mother’s problems were blacks who were on welfare and too lazy to work, or Hispanics who were coming into the country illegally. But she didn’t. She sought out allies in her fight against injustice.
Anyway, Ashley finishes her story and then goes around the room and asks everyone else why they’re supporting the campaign. They all have different stories and reasons. Many bring up a specific issue. And finally they come to this elderly black man who’s been sitting there quietly the entire time. And Ashley asks him why he’s there. And he does not bring up a specific issue. He does not say health care or the economy. He does not say education or the war. He does not say that he was there because of Barack Obama. He simply says to everyone in the room, “I am here because of Ashley.”
“I’m here because of Ashley.” By itself, that single moment of recognition between that young white girl and that old black man is not enough. It is not enough to give health care to the sick, or jobs to the jobless, or education to our children.
But it is where we start. It is where our union grows stronger. And as so many generations have come to realize over the course of the two-hundred and twenty one years since a band of patriots signed that document in Philadelphia, that is where the perfection begins.
Yes. We. Can.
Andy Sullivan had this to say about it:
I do want to say that this searing, nuanced, gut-wrenching, loyal, and deeply, deeply Christian speech is the most honest speech on race in America in my adult lifetime. It is a speech we have all been waiting for for a generation. Its ability to embrace both the legitimate fears and resentments of whites and the understandable anger and dashed hopes of many blacks was, in my view, unique in recent American history.
And it was a reflection of faith – deep, hopeful, transcending faith in the promises of the Gospels. And it was about America – its unique promise, its historic purpose, and our duty to take up the burden to perfect this union – today, in our time, in our way.
I have never felt more convinced that this man’s candidacy – not this man, his candidacy – and what he can bring us to achieve – is an historic opportunity. This was a testing; and he did not merely pass it by uttering safe bromides. He addressed the intimate, painful love he has for an imperfect and sometimes embittered man. And how that love enables him to see that man’s faults and pain as well as his promise. This is what my faith is about. It is what the Gospels are about. This is a candidate who does not merely speak as a Christian. He acts like a Christian.
As Rob notes, however, it should surprise no one that Fox is boiling the speech down to Obama still considering Wright “like family.” They don’t like it when people insist on talking about issues and matters of substance over there.
Best. Dogtoy. EVAR.
Granted, for this to work, you’d need a pretty smart dog. Even so, very cool.
Just enjoy the view. Don’t worry about what it might mean.
This looks awful cool, but it does sort of make me wonder what all the extra ‘lectricity might be doing to, say, me.
This will appeal to like 5% of you
On the tenth anniversary of the release of In the Aeroplane Over The Sea, Slate asks Whatever Happened to Jeff Mangum and Neutral Milk Hotel?
Realistically, the following three words ought to be enough to make you click
Truth
Sport from Office Hell
I’ve just learned of the existence of what may be the only legitimate use of Powerpoint: Battledecks. Apparently, at SXSW, there’s a “competition” that folks are invited to participate in wherein they must present, extemporaneously, with a slide deck they have never seen and which makes no sense whatsoever. They are then graded on flow, gesture, jargon, credibility, and getting through the deck.
Madcap hilarity ensues. Uberblogger Dooce‘s husband Jon participated this year, and points us to this compilation video from Rocketboom. Jon’s post also includes links to some representative slides, most of which are enough to make you laugh without someone trying to “present” something over it. There’s also a photoset on Flickr.
Layla Wins
The niece is clearly well on her way to getting her uncle to do anything in the world for her.
Happy Birthday to Me
It’s HeathenDay, which is also the birthday of William H. Macy (’50) and Adam Clayton (’60) and, well, Bill Casey (’13) and L. Ron Hubbard (’11).
Celebrate in any way you feel appropriate. We suggest whisky and cake.
Next year will be the really fun one, since it’ll be the first time since 1998 that my birthday has fallen on Friday, which some folks consider unlucky. We disagree, since the first time our birthday fell on a Friday was our very first go-round, in 1970.
Since then, the 13th has only been on a Friday in ’81, ’87, ’92, and ’98. That pesky leap year keeps getting in the way.
We suspect a Big-Ass Party is called for in honor of my Sixth Friday Birthday next year, which would be flaunting tradition — I’ll only be 39, and convention would suggest the big party would come in 2010, but fuck that. Fridays are more fun.
(Btw, very quick and dirty: for ((i=1970;i<=2009;i+=1)); do cal march $i | grep -e ‘ 8 9 10 11 12 13 14’ -e ‘March’; done)
Thanks, McHorne!
In celebration of our upcoming HeathenDay, we’ve been blessed!
Conditional Overmeta
If I blog about Mohney tumbling about me tumbling about him tumbling about his blog, will some sort of postmodern singularity occur? I guess we’ll see.
Hah!
Via Rob, we find this fine quote: “Saying that Hillary has Executive Branch experience is like saying Yoko Ono was a Beatle.”
From Kos.
Dept. of MetaMedia
If you follow the gossip sites — shut up; I know you do — you may have heard the story about Paris Hilton giving away diamonds, which was of course gobbled up by all the celeb outlets.
Turns it, the whole thing was staged as part of Ashton Kutcher’s new project, a sort of meta-media version of Punk’d designed with the celeb-focussed media, not celebs themselves, as the butt of the joke:
Pop Fiction, an eight-episode series, is a prank show targeting paparazzi and gullible media outlets. It’s made with the eager help of stars, who were the laughing stocks of Kutcher’s former MTV show. This time the shoe’s on the other foot, and the series has been kept so tightly under wraps that E!’s own website fell victim to the Hilton hoax and other planted stories that producers won’t yet divulge.
It’s really, really hard not to like this idea a whole lot.
The failure of American news media in a nutshell
This video is a pretty excellent discussion of Adam Smith and economic theory. It’s between P. J. O’Rourke and Jon Stewart on **Comedy Central*.
HOWTO: Ensure your child needs a lifetime of therapy
Install one of these in your home.
GeekObama
You people SO get extra points if you can tell me where the dialog in this animated GIF is from:
(Dorman: You’re disqualified.)
Yes, Other Countries Still Have Better Ads
Imagine the riots we’d have from the idiot-goons if we ran this ad here.
Delicious
BoingBoingTV gives us Kung Fu Fuck You, which is actually the first part of a double feature also including a spot for the Falipornia Speak Therapy Institute. “We learn to nouns, sentences, and talking!”
Dept. of Cool Toys
This may be the coolest virtual toy ever. It’s like digital blocks, of any size, with adjustable physics.
More More on Gygax
Check out the Random Harlot Encounter subtable over at BoingBoing.
Oh. My.
I’m not sure what the origin of this is, but the Aimee Mann Christmas Special is not something you should miss at all. It’s weird, surreal, and chock full of cameos — Patton Oswalt, Emily Proctor, Fred Armisen, Ben Stiller, etc.
I’ve had this on my desk for a while, and just got around to watching it now. The whole thing’s about 25 minutes, split into 3 parts.
Amusingly, the director — Michael Blieden — is the same guy behind this very odd Kanye video starring Will Oldham as well as several other amusing bits.
More on Gygax
From woot.com, we get “16 Gary Gygax Jokes We Better Not Catch You Making.” Our faves:
- “Now who will lead our young people to Satan?”
- “At least he didn’t live to see Disney’s Greyhawk on Ice.”
- “When I heard, I cried 2d10 tears.”
and
- “Heart condition? Wow, I always thought it would be owlbears that got him.”
(via JZ.)
Dept. of Creepy Corporate Behavior
Two bits, recently:
ONE: I get an update email from an online magazine that’s usually chock full of images and crap. I read the text, and never bother loading the images. Actually, I rarely load any images, since images in email are usually worthless footer graphics or, worse, web bugs designed to allow the sender to know when and if you’ve read their mail. No thank you.
Sure enough, they think I’m not reading their updates, so they sent me a message saying “hey, we noticed you don’t read our mail, so we’ll quit sending it to you if you don’t [click here].”
Obviously, they’re using these web bugs. Icky. I like the magazine, but I don’t think I’ll bother reading the much anymore.
TWO: Yesterday, I got a call on the old line from a credit card company pitching add-on services. It was an ARU, but one dressed up and obfuscated in such a way as to try very hard to pretend it was a real person, and they’d worked hard enough that I was thrown initially. When I interrupted the voice to ask if it as a real person, it said “Do I sound that bad? (pause)” and then resumed its pitch. I asked irrelevant questions, and it clumsily spat out something based on keywords, like Eliza. I asked it to say “rutabaga,” and it hung up on me. Very creepy. Also an excellent way to ensure I never do business with your company.
Something we forgot to note
A couple weeks ago, Richard Belzer made a guest appearance on The Wire in-character as former Baltimore homicide detective turned NYC SVU member John Munch.
This appearance put Belzer-as-Munch completely over the top in a fairly esoteric category: He’s got the record for appearances as the same character on different shows:
- Homicide (original cast member)
- Law & Order (4 crossover eps)
- Law & Order: SVU (regular cast member)
- Law & Order: Trial by Jury (one episode, “Skeleton pt 2”)
- The X-Files (“Unusual Suspects”)
- Arrested Development (“Exit Strategy”)
- The Beat (“They Say It’s Your Birthday”)
- The Wire (“Took”)
Wikipedia, by the way, notes that he’s slated to appear in the French adaptation of Criminal Intent, which would take him to 9. (The character is actually one step ahead of the actor, as a Munch Muppet appears in a “Special Letters Unit” Sesame Street short, but is voiced by someone else.)
What’s particularly amusing about his appearance on the Wire? He’s in a bar that obviously references the bar in which Munch and Homicide colleague Meldrick Lewis were partners (with others) back in the Homicide days. Lewis was played by Clark Johnson, who has a major role in this season of the Wire — as someone else.
(Yes, we talked about this once before.)
Sadly, the saving throw failed
E. Gary Gygax, Geek icon and creator of Dungeons and Dragons, is dead at 69. More at Wired.
Even more crap Mississippi has lost
Surprise, surprise
The TSA? Turns out it’s full of thieves. Some $31 million bucks worth of goodies have vanished from baggage in the last 3 years. Nice.
Think X-eyes, but cooler
Go check this out. (SFW, via Rob.)
Um.
We’re not sure which part of this is weirder:
- That someone said “Hey! Let’s make a Spongebob Rectal Thermometer!”; or
- That someone on said design team decided that it should play the theme song when inserted.
Granted, if you’re going to make it musical, that does seem to be the right time, but frankly we question the whole enterprise.
Just don’t hang it over the crib
It’s no Calder, but the Scissor mobile is pretty dang cool.
A glimpse into a different and altogether jazzier world
What if Saul Bass had done the opening credits to Star Wars?
Wait. Rube Goldberg was Dutch?
Go visit this Dutch store’s site, and then wait for a few seconds. Somebody’s got a case of the too-clever-by-half over there, but it’s cute.
(Thanks, Dan!)
Could it be?
The new trailer for Iron Man makes us hopeful that the coming year might feature not one but TWO superhero movies that don’t suck.
Please don’t ruin them, Hollywood.
MUST BAN ALL SCARY ITEMS
BoingBoing has video of a scare-happy Ohio reporter whipping up the fear over the menace of brass knuckles made out of Lexan. ZOMG!!!!1!!!!
Dept. of Excessive Business Travel
Since the long engagement last year (almost exactly — I was in Maryland from 2/25/07 through 6/1/07, except for weekends), my travel has been mostly sane. I’ve had trips, and even back to back trips, but at no point were things nutty like the two-flights-a-week deal last winter.
Until this month.
- 2/5 – 2/11: Colorado for ski & strategy retreat with management
- 2/14 – 2/16: Austin for premier of Speeding Motorcycle
- 2/19 – 2/23: Washington (DC) for meetings and client service
- 2/23 – 2/24: Austin (again)
- 2/25 – 2/28: Daytona for conference
All told, I spent 16 nights of February in non-Houston locations. Ow.
Happy Leap Day
In junior high, we were tested on the proper way to calculate leap years. The popular assumption is that it’s every 4 years, but that’s not quite right. Actually, that’s just the starting point.
It’s a leap year if:
- The year is divisible by 4, and it’s not a century year
- The year is divisible by 4, and it’s a century year also divisible by 400.
In other words, 1900, while divisible by 4, is not divisible by 400, and so was not a leap year — nor will 2100 be one, either. However, 2000 was.
What’s sort of funny about this is that, to a first approximation, everyone in the sound of my voice could spend their whole life living on the simpler “every 4 years” rule and not miss a single one. From 1901 through 2099, it’s every 4 years, but only because we happen to be living through a once-every-400-years exception to the exception.
Dept. of You’ve Got To Be Shitting Me
A couple writers — Paul Farhi at WaPo, and Maureen Ryan at the Chicago Trib — are whining that Saturday Night Live has done something racially insensitive in casting Latino-Asian Fred Armisen as Obama in last week’s cold open, and that it would have been more appropriate to cast a black actor.
Oh, please. Fred Armisen is a profoundly gifted physical mimic (though his verbal skills aren’t a match for castmate Bill Hader), and is the natural choice for a whole host of political and cultural targets. He’s been Prince, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, George Carlin, David Gregory, Vicente Fox, Steve Jobs, and Tony Danza, for crying out loud. The right person to impersonate anyone is the person who can most bring humor to the skit. Darryl Hammond did a wonderful Jesse Jackson, and he’s white as Wonder Bread. Billy Crystal made us all laugh as Sammy Davis, Jr. It’s not about race. It’s about the funny — and on a deadline. Farhi and Ryan are at best missing the point, and at worst grasping at racial straws to create controversy and therefore draw attention to themselves.
Dept. of Fictional Obituaries
There is nothing whatsoever to dislike about this clip
Mythbusters’ Kari takes a minigun to some unruly arboreal life.
We’re pretty sure they’re only using that word because it’s Bill Buckley
From the NYT Obit:
William F. Buckley Jr., who marshaled polysyllabic exuberance, famously arched eyebrows and a refined, perspicacious mind to elevate conservatism to the center of American political discourse, died Wednesday at his home in Stamford, Conn.
The oil heir, father of the American conservative movement, defender of fascists and McCarthyites, prototype of countless rhetorical bullies, vanity publisher, and general reactionary tool died today in his office. He was 82.
More: Alex Balk, writing at Radar, reminds us of Buckley’s civil rights record with his brilliant headline: William F. Buckley goes to White People Heaven.
Even more, from Making Light:
“The central question that emerges…is whether the White community in the South is entitled to take such measures as are necessary to prevail, politically and culturally, in areas where it does not predominate numerically? The sobering answer is Yes–the White community is so entitled because, for the time being, it is the advanced race.” –William F. Buckley, National Review, August 24, 1957
There’s your “refined, perspicacious mind” for you. The one that, we’re told, “elevated conservatism to the center of American political discourse.” Racism and power-worship–and, from first to last, uncompromising defense of the idea that society should be structured into orders and classes.
Preach on, Patrick.
Experiments with MicroMobileBlogging
There are now official Heathen channels at Tumblr and Twitter wherein I will make occasional short comment. Both are very amenable to mobile posts, which is a good idea given my travel schedule of late.
The latter can be followed on your mobile, if you like; in fact, I encourage it. Twitter is mostly about the text-message conversation, so it seems the value of Twitter grows dramatically as more people participate in the same mob. It’s necessarily a short-form kind of deal, though.
Tumblr (note Web 2.0 de rigueur lack of penultimate vowel) is a more pure web thing, and will be present in some form here (see sidebar for first experiment), or seen on its own at the site linked above. It’s likely to get more traffic first, since I just signed up for it — also, it supports longer posts, pictures, etc., which I can’t do with Twitter.
Secret Laws are Undemocratic
Check out this discussion of the FISA debate, which ends with:
…[T]he senators engaged in a debate over surveillance laws are legally barred from explaining how the nation’s surveillance laws work, because part of the law is public, but another part that supersedes the published part remains secret. (Emphasis added.)
On the other hand, McConnell and the vice president and president are equipped with declassification powers and thus are free to say whatever they like about the rulings — including inducing journalists to mislead people and describing the dire consequences of the rulings.
Such is the state of debate in a country with secret laws.
I’m not sure how we got here, nor am I sure exactly how to fix it, but I do not believe there is any reason sufficient in our republic to justify the creation of any law that every citizen may not inspect for themselves. Period. Democracies require transparency. Period.
GenX Irony meets Web-Culture Craftiness
How ’bout some feltidermy?
Life in the Future
Someone’s invented an implantable Orgasmatron.