Popular Mechanics interviews Bruce Schneier. Madcap hilarity ensues.

Bruce Schneier is a renowned security professional; his editorial in the Times on the TSA begins thusly:

A short history of airport security: We screen for guns and bombs, so the terrorists use box cutters. We confiscate box cutters and corkscrews, so they put explosives in their sneakers. We screen footwear, so they try to use liquids. We confiscate liquids, so they put PETN bombs in their underwear. We roll out full-body scanners, even though they wouldn’t have caught the Underwear Bomber, so they put a bomb in a printer cartridge. We ban printer cartridges over 16 ounces — the level of magical thinking here is amazing — and they’re going to do something else.

This is a stupid game, and we should stop playing it.

It’s not even a fair game. It’s not that the terrorist picks an attack and we pick a defense, and we see who wins. It’s that we pick a defense, and then the terrorists look at our defense and pick an attack designed to get around it. Our security measures only work if we happen to guess the plot correctly. If we get it wrong, we’ve wasted our money. This isn’t security; it’s security theater.

A Talking Points Memo reader writes in with his thoughts on the TSA checkpoints. A taste:

I’m a lawyer. I go through security checkpoints all the time. Went through one at the local criminal courthouse this morning. They x-rayed my stuff, sent me through a metal detector, and then had me come back through it to pick up my stuff when they were done looking at it on the monitor. Done. 30 seconds. The lawyer’s line at the courthouse is ever-so-slightly less rigid than the general public line (if it’s obviously my belt buckle setting off the detector, they’ve never made me take it off; they’ve learned to accept that lawyers often keep calendars on their smartphones so we don’t have to check them before entering the building, though they check to make sure the ringer is off), but even the general public line is pretty much what we were used to pre-9/11. X ray machine. Metal detector. Wand if they can’t quickly figure out what’s setting off the detector. Pat downs only if you’re still setting off the detector and nothing’s visible. 45 seconds or a minute, tops. And you know, a rather substantial percentage of the people who go through the line to get into a criminal courthouse are people out on bail, some of whom are actual dangerous criminals. And a lot of the others are people who are witnesses to crimes whose presence is not exactly welcomed by the criminal element. Honestly, this new TSA genital-feeling stuff goes further than I’ve ever had to go through to even go into a prison. They cavity search prisoners for drugs and weapons, of course, but lawyers and other visitors? Not in my experience. Not in this northeastern state. Not unless they’re pretty damn sure you’re carrying contraband. And we’ve had, what, 3 attempted bombing incidents post-9/11? Out of how many scheduled flights? I just did the math. Over 150 million worldwide. That’s one attempt per 50 million flights.

Go read the whole thing.

Well, turns out, they won’t say, as it’s a state secret — which, to us, means “no.”

TSA Agents Absolutely Hate The New Pat Downs, and find them demoralizing.

TSA weasel John Pistole notes that the new pornoscanners are supposed to turn up artfully concealed objects not previously discovered, and which the TSA’s own testing showed were easy to get on planes. I assume he means things like small knives or razorblades too small to trigger the metal detector.

Here’s the thing: I’m sure hundreds or thousands of such objects, if not more, make it onto planes every day. And I’m equally sure it doesn’t make a damn bit of difference to my safety. It’s impossible to hijack an airliner today. That game is over for the bad guys. The 9/11 trick didn’t even work all day on 9/11, and now it’s completely impossible — you can’t get to the cockpit. And the TSA, bless their empty little heads, hasn’t even managed to stop the attempts at airborne violence that have been attempted since then — it was passengers who caught Richard Reid, lest you forget. And the London plot that gave us the bullshit baggie rule was broken up by law enforcement, and probably wouldn’t have worked anyway.

But the TSA has been busily confiscating scissors and screwdrivers and razorblades and pocketknives for 9 years, and they’ve mistaken that for their mission. NONE of the objects they’ve taken were part of terrorist plots. You can’t hijack a plane with a Leatherman, and the TSA knows this; the confiscation is just a giant con on the American people. Taking away pocketknives is busywork. It makes us LESS safe, because it obligates resources that could be better spent elsewhere.

And now they’re going to do MORE of it, with their bullshit scanners pushed on them by lobbyists and completely unlikely to enhance our safety. And they’ll keep doing this until we the people — for whom every bellycrawling TSA jackass works — insist, loudly and repeatedly, that they stop. Write your congresspeople. Yell at your airlines. Opt out of this pornoscanners, and be unpleasant when they touch your junk.

A heartwarming tale of TSA revolt, over at Gizmodo.

In case you were unaware, Giz has some info.

• They can’t see through skin, so any terrorist willing to swallow or otherwise, um, introduce explosives into his body will slide right through; and
• They cost about half a billion dollars in total.
• Also, turns out they do save images

Can you say boondoggle? Opt Out. Fly with dignity..

The Allied Pilots Association is advising its members to refuse the x-ray scanner on the grounds that they get too much radiation already.

The great backscatter boondoggle is costing half a billion dollars, will slow air travel even more, and will do virtually nothing to catch anything that’s actually dangerous. We have no one’s word but the manufacturer’s — and the TSA’s — that these things are actually safe, and we’re just supposed to trust the TSA that their employees aren’t saving the images for their own amusement.

No thanks, jackasses. I’ll skip it.