Boston Dynamics’ Big Dog quadruped robot can negotiate uneven terrain, and even resists being kicked over. Also, it looks very, very weird. (YouTube link.)
Fraggle Rock is coming
Ahmet Zappa is developing a movie based on Fraggle Rock.
Not that we needed any more proof of his douchebaggery, but still
Rush Limbaugh, idiot buffoon of the Right, thinks Michael J. Fox was acting in the pro-Dem spot we mentioned a couple days ago.
What a jackass.
Dear Intarwub
Why we miss what MTV used to be
Twenty years ago, MTV showed videos. Lots of them were crap, but some, a tiny but measurable fraction, were the inspired minifilms that defined the genre. Sometime in the 90s, though, they stopped being a music channel and started being a lifestyle channel, which is why we’ve never before today seen Michel Gondry‘s utterly brilliant video for Bjork’s “Bachelorette,” off her 1997 record Homogenic.
If they still played stuff like this, we’d have it on all the time.
We want one, but we’d prefer it in PDF
We’ve talked for years about wanting to build a dynamic, omnibus historical timeline, with just about every kind of event mapped onto it — nation-states, dynasties, empires, global events, wars, advances, discoveries, etc. — so that when someone says something about, say, the Hundred Years War, you could consult the timeline and see the historical context. Oh, and, by the way, what was happening in China then? The way we’ve been kicking it around, it’d be a database-driven tool that would allow filtration by geography, subject, etc., for dynamic views of history at a glance.
We didn’t figure we were inventing the idea of an omnibus timeline, and we were right: Kevin Kelly’s Cool Tools weblog points out Rand McNally’s Histomap of World History (crappy name, neat idea). It’s a 4-foot-high chart showing much of what we’re talking about, though of course in dead-tree form it’s not possible to filter; you’re stuck with the view they give you. Still, it seems awful darn cool, and we’d love to put one on our office wall. At ten bucks, why not?
(Oh, by the way: we’re pretty sure this is the 4,000th installment of Heathen. Yay!)
Michael J. Fox channels Yul Brynner
Michael J. Fox has done a commerical for Democratic senate hopeful Claire McCaskill in Missouri, who’s running against an anti-stem-cell incumbent (Republican Jim Talent).
After Pat’s Birthday
Pat Tillman’s brother, who enlisted with him after 9/11, has written a piece on the mess we’re in, and what you can do about it. Read it. Now. A bit to get you started:
It is Pat’s birthday on November 6, and elections are the day after. It gets me thinking about a conversation I had with Pat before we joined the military. He spoke about the risks with signing the papers. How once we committed, we were at the mercy of the American leadership and the American people. How we could be thrown in a direction not of our volition. How fighting as a soldier would leave us without a voice… until we get out.
Much has happened since we handed over our voice:
Somehow we were sent to invade a nation because it was a direct threat to the American people, or to the world, or harbored terrorists, or was involved in the September 11 attacks, or received weapons-grade uranium from Niger, or had mobile weapons labs, or WMD, or had a need to be liberated, or we needed to establish a democracy, or stop an insurgency, or stop a civil war we created that can’t be called a civil war even though it is. Something like that.
[…]
Somehow the more soldiers that die, the more legitimate the illegal invasion becomes.
(Hat tip to Rob.)
Excellent
The world’s fastest street-legal car? A 1972 Vauxhall Victor with, shall we say, extensive modifications: 2,200 horses, two turbos, and a 9-liter V-8.
FanTAStic.
Yet another reason why we don’t bother with Cnet or News.com
Via TechDirt, News.com editor explains why Google is Immoral. Seriously, these people are idiots. The story News.com is mentioning concerns the similarly boneheaded Belgian press organs that insisted, via lawsuit, that Google stop indexing them. And they won.
Think about that for a minute. Google indexes them, which makes it easier for people to FIND and READ their stories. And they sued to stop it. Whisky. Tango. Foxtrot, right?
Well, not in CNet-land, where Charles Cooper thinks the Belgians are on to something. Whatever. CNet’s been a waste of time for a while now; we think it’s time to finally out-and-out delete ’em from our feedreader.
Your Government At Work
Rep. Jerry Lewis (R-CA) (no, not the famous one) has been under investigation as part of the Duke Cunningham affair for quite some time; the powerful Appropriations Committee chair has spent nearly a million bucks on legal fees already.
No surprise, right? In bed with Duke, odds are you got a bit dirty in the process.
Well, Ol’ Jerry apparently got tired of defending himself, so he’s decided to shut down the investigation. On Monday, he fired 60 contract investigators working for his committee and charged with rooting out fraud, corruption, etc., and then yesterday tried to claim said dismissal was a bipartisan move, contrary to confirmable facts.
Can you say “culture of corruption?”
They move fast.
Moving quickly to implement the bill signed by President Bush this week that authorizes military trials of enemy combatants, the administration has formally notified the U.S. District Court here that it no longer has jurisdiction to consider hundreds of habeas corpus petitions filed by inmates at the Guantanamo Bay prison in Cuba.
In a notice dated Wednesday, the Justice Department listed 196 pending habeas cases, some of which cover groups of detainees. The new Military Commissions Act (MCA), it said, provides that “no court, justice, or judge” can consider those petitions or other actions related to treatment or imprisonment filed by anyone designated as an enemy combatant, now or in the future.
Gartner Proves Their Head Is Still Up Their Own Ass
We’ve been shaking our heads at Gartner for years now, but this one really takes the cake. Via /., we hear that Gartner thinks Apple should get out of the hardware business. Er, right. How about their record breaking quarter just now, or the runaway success of the iPod? Failing the obviousness of those, how about something that should be clear to people who bill themselves as analysts: Apple kit just works because they own the whole product. Making the hardware gives them control of far more aspects of the product, which translates into the overall better user experience common to Apple products.
But it’s actually even stupider that just missing all those points: Gartner actually thinks Apple should outsource to Dell. We don’t know what they’re smoking (or how they’re making money), but we sure would like some. Have the folks at Gartner compared an Inspiron to a Powerbook lately? We’re guessing not.
Update: Mac pundit John Gruber of Daring Fireball agrees.
Telescope Rob Puts It All In Perspective For Us
Or, at least, he points us to a picture that does:
Olbermann on the Military Commissions Act
As always, Keith speaks the truth:
…on this first full day that the Military Commissions Act is in force, we now face what our ancestors faced, at other times of exaggerated crisis and melodramatic fear-mongering:
A government more dangerous to our liberty than is the enemy it claims to protect us from.
We have been here before — and we have been here before led here — by men better and wiser and nobler than George W. Bush.
He closes address the President:
Did it ever occur to you once, that in just 27 months and two days from now when you leave office, some irresponsible future President and a “competent tribunal” of lackeys would be entitled, by the actions of your own hand, to declare the status of “Unlawful Enemy Combatant” for, and convene a Military Commission to try, not John Walker Lindh, but George Walker Bush?
We have limitations on governmental (and especially executive) power for very good reasons. An excellent rule of thumb when contemplating expansion of those powers it so imagine how someone completely at odds with one’s own political values might utilize such an expansion. The GOP in general and this Administration in particular have completely missed this lesson, and we pray that a wiser Congress may see this folly, and correct this travesty sooner rather than later.
Colbert, of course, is the right guy to deconstruct Santorum
At least when Santorum tries to use Lord of the Rings references to explain the Iraq war:
Best process monitor EVAR.
BoingBoing points us to The Device, a handcrafted cherry box with two analog dials and a USB interface. With host software, you can have it display whatever you want on the dials and lights that festoon this mad-scientist-worthy gadget.
We want one, but only after they release the OS X and/or Linux software.
Things we have trouble describing
See, there’s this site we found courtesy of the Former Heights Attorney, and it’s got all these pictures of art made from just cutting a single sheet of paper. It’s hard to explain, but we’re pretty sure you just need to go look. (Totally safe for work.)
So, as we wait for a build to test, we’re cleaning out our email
And what do we find? Law and Order: Special Letters Unit. We love that the detectives actually resemble Stabler, Benson, and (most obviously) Richard Belzer‘s John Munch (whose name is actually Munch in the skit).
Munch-being-Munch in the skit makes the character the most crossed-over one in TV, with appearances on 8 different shows. Wikipedia suggests that Belzer only played him in 7 of those, which is a record on its own. Belzer as Munch appears in 122 episodes of Homicide, 158 and counting on L&O:SVU, plus crossovers on “regular” Law & Order, L&O:Trial By Jury, The X-Files, Arrested Development, and the something called The Beat; someone else voices the muppet.
(With this many crossovers, obviously Munch plays into the Tommy Westphall Hypothesis.)
We’d really like to test software now.
Well, sure!
Triple-F asks “Didja ever wanna doodle in 3-D?”
Dept. of Funny-Because-It’s-True
What if Clippy came to PHP?
(If you don’t get it, you’re probably better off. Hat tip to Mike.)
What opposing gay marriage means
Former Rep. Gerry Studds married his partner, Dean Hara in Massachusetts, but the Feds don’t recognize that — so Mr Hara is therefore ineligible for any portion of Studds’ Congressional pension.
Opposing gay marriage means this theme will be repeated over and over again. Inheritance and survivor’s benefits happen automatically for married heterosexuals, and are capriciously denied to homosexuals seeking the same union. It’s petty and sad, and speaks to a profound moral blindness from our supposed “Christian” Right.
The GOP would rather you didn’t vote
More on the GOP’s ongoing voter-suppression programs, this time in California. Many SoCal Hispanics got letters telling them it would be illegal for immigrants to vote.
If your victory depends on keeping people from voting, doesn’t that say something about your respect for democracy?
30 Second Bunny Theater Returns
The first rule is, of course, not to talk about it.
We knew it was coming, but that doesn’t make it any more acceptable
Bush signed the torture-and-no-Habeas bill today. See also the Washington Post:
President Bush this morning proudly signed into law a bill that critics consider one of the most un-American in the nation’s long history. The new law vaguely bans torture — but makes the administration the arbiter of what is torture and what isn’t. It allows the president to imprison indefinitely anyone he decides falls under a wide-ranging new definition of unlawful combatant. It suspends the Great Writ of habeas corpus for detainees. It allows coerced testimony at trial. It immunizes retroactively interrogators who may have engaged in torture.
and the ACLU:
The president can now — with the approval of Congress — indefinitely hold people without charge, take away protections against horrific abuse, put people on trial based on hearsay evidence, authorize trials that can sentence people to death based on testimony literally beaten out of witnesses, and slam shut the courthouse door for habeas petitions. Nothing could be further from the American values we all hold in our hearts than the Military Commissions Act.
So doomed.
“Sir? Your daughter is BATSHIT.”
Grace, a 6-year-old from Kansas, is obsessed with Dick Cheney.
Dept. of Telling Statistics
MAD points us to this bit over at the American Prospect, which is really just a pointer to Krugman:
There are two reasons why party control is everything in this election.
The first, lesser reason is the demonstrated ability of Republican Congressional leaders to keep their members in line, even those members who cultivate a reputation as moderates or mavericks. G.O.P. politicians sometimes make a show of independence, as Senator John McCain did in seeming to stand up to President Bush on torture. But in the end, they always give the White House what it wants: after getting a lot of good press for his principled stand, Mr. McCain signed on to a torture bill that in effect gave Mr. Bush a completely free hand.
And if the Republicans retain control of Congress, even if it’s by just one seat in each house, Mr. Bush will retain that free hand. If they lose control of either house, the G.O.P. juggernaut will come to a shuddering halt.
Yet that’s the less important reason this election is all about party control. The really important reason may be summed up in two words: subpoena power…
The current Congress has shown no inclination to investigate the Bush administration. Last year The Boston Globe offered an illuminating comparison: when Bill Clinton was president, the House took 140 hours of sworn testimony into whether Mr. Clinton had used the White House Christmas list to identify possible Democratic donors. But in 2004 and 2005, a House committee took only 12 hours of testimony on the abuses at Abu Ghraib.
The official Heathen position has always been “keep either party from controlling both the White House and Congress,” but even our cynical hearts couldn’t predict how bad it would get once that happened.
The next sound you hear may well be your own head exploding
Fox News (we know, we know) is reporting that Scarlett Johansson will release an album of Tom Waits covers next spring.
From an IM, just a moment ago:
MAD: So what is the “smiley” for your head exploding?
We’re not sure, but we’re pretty certain this event calls for one. Especially if it doesn’t suck.
First name Mister. Middle name period. Last name T.
Don’t you hunger in the depths of your soul for more Mr. T content on teh Intarwub? Well, hunger no more, for we have located the Mister T Visitor Guide to Los Angeles.
How to have a hangover
Have a party where the word “jeroboam” is used.
How many?
The Lancet says, probably correctly (since they’re, you know, scientists), that the Iraqi war has cost 600K+ Iraqi lives. That’s a pretty big number, and it makes the war look even worse than it did already, so the reaction of the right wingers isn’t surprising at all. Also unsurprising is how unconvincing their reactions are; they pretty much all boil down to the sort of denial we’ve grown to expect from Bush: “I don’t consider it a credible report.” From Billmon:
Well of course Bible Boy doesn’t think it’s credible. After all, what do Johns Hopkins University and The Lancet know about faith-based epidemiology? Nothing. They’re just a bunch of doctors. Now if the study had been conducted by a committee of evangelical chiropractors from Oral Roberts University, that would be different.
Exactly. We’d laugh, but it’s too depressing.
All Hail Google!
There’s now a GoogleMaps for Treos. You can zoom in and out, and scroll the map with the stylus. Awesome.
Dept. of Terribly Amusing Search Terms Found In Logs
No, we won’t tell you what it means, either (it’s an old college joke (you sort of had to be there at the time (HDANCN?))).
If it weren’t for bad luck, she’d have no luck at all
Gawker reports that the woman who owns the apartment in which Cory Lidle tried to land this week is also the same woman who was seriously injured by a six-story Cat in the Hat balloon at the 1997 Macy’s parade.
Where is the future we were promised?
At least BoingBoing is on top of the jetpack part.
Hawesome.
So, you’re probably aware of Stephen Colbert’s green-screen contest, right? We’ll wait if you’re not.
Well, “George L.” at ILM submitted an entry.
New Frontiers in Fair Cuisine
BoingBoing reports that the solid/liquid barrier has been breeched, and that as a consequence deep-fried Coca-cola is now possible.
Dept. of Disturbing and Prescient Quotes
“When Fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.” — Sinclair Lewis
Mr Greenwald would like to remind you what it means to be “American” under George Bush
We are now a nation who openly assert that the government has the right to arrest and detain without charge any person, citizen or not, interesting to the President with no counsel, no recourse, and with no protections from inhumane treatment.
The Bush administration’s May, 2002 lawless detention of U.S. citizen Jose Padilla — on U.S. soil — was, as I recounted in my book, the first incident which really prompted me to begin concluding that things were going terribly awry in our country. The administration declared Padilla an “enemy combatant,” put him in a military prison, and refused to charge him with any crime or even allow him access to a lawyer or anyone else. He stayed in a black hole, kept by his own government, for the next three-a-half-years with no charges of any kind ever asserted against him and with the administration insisting on the right to detain him (and any other American citizen) indefinitely — all based solely on the secret, unchallengeable say-so of the President that he was an “enemy combatant.”
Fuck you, Big Chief
Cursive writing is disappearing, in part because most schools no longer even do handwriting instruction beyond “write legibly.” Only 15 percent of the handwritten essays from the 2006 SAT were in cursive
We’d like to take this opportunity to stick our tongue out at our elementary teachers who for some reason found handwriting far more interesting and important than, say, reading, or science. We always saw it as a waste of our time, and treated it accordingly.
Thanks Intarwub!
Now we can use novelty soaps to mislead our children about marine biology!
Dept. of Abstract Impressionism, Web Toy Division
Pretend to be an influential and tragic painter at JacksonPollock.org; just move your mouse at different speeds, and click to change colors.
Copious quantities of alcohol, widespread praise, the attentions of Peggy Guggenheim, Lee Krasner, and young Jennifer Connelly not included.
(Hat tip to Rob.)
Dept. of Awesomeness
Via BoingBoing, video of the best damn rideable mechanical lion you’ll ever see.
Ignorance Out West
Out in Montana, a GOP lawmaker (Roger Koopman; of course he’s Republican) is upset with Governor Brian Schweitzer for correctly suggesting it was ignorant to believe the earth isn’t millions of years old.
Rep. Roger Koopman, R-Bozeman, called Schweitzer’s statement “incredibly bigoted.”
Speaking to a crowd of school children, parents and teachers in Bozeman on Friday about global warming, Schweitzer asked how many in the crowd thought the Earth was hundreds of millions of years old. Most of the children in the audience raised their hands.
He then asked how many believed the planet was less than a million years old. At least two people, including Koopman, who was in the crowd, raised their hands.
During an interview later with the Bozeman Daily Chronicle, Schweitzer noted Koopman’s response. He said some people believe the planet is only 4,000 to 6,000 years old, despite geological evidence to the contrary.
Schweitzer said he needs support from a state Legislature that will help move Montana’s agenda forward, “not people who think the Earth is 4,000 years old.””
Koopman called the comments insulting.
“He insulted many Christian people and other people of faith that arrived at that position other than the way I arrived at it,” he said.
Schweitzer did not immediately return telephone calls seeking comment Sunday or Monday.
Koopman said his belief in the Earth’s age is not based on his faith, but on his scientific investigations.
Koopman, clearly, is both an idiot and a jackass of the first order. We’re sure he enjoys the complete support of the Republican party.
Our Esteemed President
Back in July, Bush tried to smack down a CNN reporter in a press conference who asserted North Korea’s nuclear program was expanding. Keep smirking, Mr. President. Keep smirking.
Yet another thing Bush has screwed up
So, the DPRK may or may not have a real, functional nuke now. Many analysts are now saying that the perceived yield of yesterday’s explosion is far below that which Pyongyang was widely believed to be capable, strongly suggesting a failed test rather than a successful nuclear debut. That hardly matters, though, as their contempt for the international community on this point is now a matter of no dispute.
How’d this happen? It’s pretty obvious that Bush’s “get tough with the Axis of Evil” approach had more than a little to do with Kim Jong Il’s bellicosity since 2000. See Josh Marshall’s analysis:
North Korea’s nuclear program has been a problem for US presidents going back to Reagan, and the conflict between North and South has been a key issue for US presidents going back to Truman. As recently as 1994, the US came far closer to war with North Korea than most Americans realize.
President Clinton eventually concluded a complicated and multipart agreement in which the North Koreans would suspend their production of plutonium in exchange for fuel oil, help building light water nuclear reactors (the kind that don’t help making bombs) and a vague promise of diplomatic normalization.
President Bush came to office believing that Clinton’s policy amounted to appeasement. Force and strength were the way to deal with North Korea, not a mix of force, diplomacy and aide. And with that premise, President Bush went about scuttling the 1994 agreement, using evidence that the North Koreans were pursuing uranium enrichment (another path to the bomb) as the final straw.
Remember the guiding policy of the early Bush years: Clinton did it=Bad, Bush=Not whatever Clinton did.
All diplomatic niceties aside, President Bush’s idea was that the North Koreans would respond better to threats than Clinton’s mix of carrots and sticks.
Then in the winter of 2002-3, as the US was preparing to invade Iraq, the North called Bush’s bluff. And the president folded. Abjectly, utterly, even hilariously if the consequences weren’t so grave and vast.
Threats are a potent force if you’re willing to follow through on them. But he wasn’t. The plutonium production plant, which had been shuttered since 1994, got unshuttered. And the bomb that exploded tonight was, if I understand this correctly, almost certainly the product of that plutonium uncorked almost four years ago.
So the President talked a good game, the North Koreans called his bluff and he folded. And since then, for all intents and purposes, and all the atmospherics to the contrary, he and his administration have done essentially nothing.
Of course, Marshall is no fan of the President, so some of you may not find this all that convincing. However, Marshall is by no means alone, and even some Republicans view this development as a significant Bush failure.
Dept. of Hilarious Editing Guidelines
From WikiMedia, the parent of WikiPedia, we find Friends of gays should not be allowed to edit articles.
Culinary Observations from a First Anniversary
Dom ’96 goes excellently well with year-old wedding cake, which, contrary to rumor, was actually delicious in its own right.
We’re sure this is just a coincidence
Lt. Cmdr. Charles Swift, the Navy lawyer who won the Hamdan decision from the Supreme Court, has been denied a promotion and will therefore be forced to retire under the Navy’s “up or out.”
Swift’s work on the Hamdan case got him plenty of admiring attention from the U.S. legal community, but apparently the government doesn’t like to lose.
Cheney’s thugs think “speech” equals “assault”
Steve Howards walked by an area where Dick Cheney was holding court, so he spoke his mind: “Your policies in Iraq are reprehensible.”
Ten minutes later, the SS arrested him and charged him with assault. Those charges were dropped, but Howards is still suing, and we’re glad he is. We here at Heathen believe that Cheney and his entourage should be held personally liable for the damages. “The VP told me to” should not shield this Secret Service jackass — Virgil D. “Gus” Reichle Jr, — from liability, and the VP himself should share that liability. This is obscene, and MUST be answered for.