NBC has no shows at iTunes now, we hear, because they didn’t like Apple’s terms, and because they wanted stricter DRM. Here’s why this is stupid: they’ve essentially forced anybody who wants to watch something not on the TV to download it. Already, Australia and Great Britain account for an enormous portion of illegally downloaded American TV — not because those places are rife with scofflaws, but because that’s the only way they can get those shows without waiting for them to be released on DVD or shown locally. Taking Show X off iTunes means that folks who want to watch that on their iPods on their morning train ride will have to resort to illegal means to do it. NBC is, in effect, encouraging piracy. Clever move, boys!
Monthly Archives: September 2007
As it turns out, all kids aren’t worthless
When David Shepherd and Travis Price saw the new kid in their school being victimized by bullies for wearing a pink shirt, the decided they’d do something about it.
The next day, they handed out hundreds of pink tank tops to as many students as they could, including the bullied new kid, specifically to infuriate, annoy, and marginalize the bullies. It worked.
“The bullies got angry,” said Travis. “One guy was throwing chairs (in the cafeteria). We’re glad we got the response we wanted.”
David said one of the bullies angrily asked him whether he knew pink on a male was a symbol of homosexuality.
He told the bully that didn’t matter to him and shouldn’t to anyone.
“Something like the colour of your shirt or pants, that’s ridiculous,” he said.
“Our intention was to stand up for this kid so he doesn’t get picked on.”
Travis said the bullies “keep giving us dirty looks, but we know we have the support of the whole student body.
Sweet Merciful Jesus
Mini-Britney bills herselfl as the “littlest Britney Spears tribute performer in the world.” There’s video.
Even Geekier Than The Prior Post
Carl Sagan explains the 4th dimension. It’s shockingly accessible, which is, we reckon, one of the billions of reasons we miss Sagan.
Dept. of DEEP Geekery, Pasted from IM
“There has never existed a mole of any human artifact, except maybe atoms of pollution.”
Dept. of Art Forms We Didn’t Know About
Book Carving. Seriously, check this out.
BEEEEES
A British beekeeper put a bell jar over one entrance to one of his hives; read from the bottom for context. (Via BoingBoing.)
Yet another reason to distrust Microsoft
They’ve been patching people’s computers without their consent, regardless of what the user’s settings were.
There’s a lot wrong with this, but let’s start with two main points:
The machine belongs to the User, not to Bill. It is ultimately up to the USER and the USER ALONE to decide what goes on the computer. Software that installs itself silently and without consent is, under most circumstances, viewed as malware (at best) or evidence of criminal trespass (at worst).
Building this back door in is simply inexcusable. If it’s there, it’s going to get exploited by black hat types. Period. WTF were they thinking?
Dept. of USB Drive Archeology
The following were entries written onsite at [REDACTED], our client back during the spring. We’re posting them now mostly because we’ve got a completion fetish.
- Things Overheard at Work (5/22)
- “Hey, did you know that just anybody can edit Wikipedia?” sigh.
- You probably think this is obvious, but you’re wrong (5/21)
- Gas is now officially more expensive than ever. The previous high was $1.35 in 1981, which, when adjusted for inflation, comes to about $3.15 in 2007 dollars. The latest reading from the Lundberg Survey puts the current average at $3.18.
- REALLY geeky (5/21)
- In case you ever need to know this: you can create modern “soft-wrapped” text in Emacs using this technique. So far, it’s working rather well.
Sun is DEAD
Sun now sells Windows servers.
Whisky. Tango. Foxtrot.
Let’s lay this out: In the mid-to-late 90s, Sun was the go-to vendor for high-end server hardware, PLUS they had the best commercial Unix by a damn sight. Solaris — poorly named though it was — had it all over the similar offerings from HP (HP/UX), IBM (AIX), and others now lost to history. Add to this their visionary — at the time — pursuit of a cross-platform programming language more or less “native” to the Internet (Java), and you got an image of a company really going places.
Then a couple things happened.
First, Linux happened when a Finnish kid managed to assemble a workable Unix clone from the Gnu project and a new kernel. It started out ok, but improved VERY rapidly; in the 16 years since its first released, it’s become one of the most popular Unix choices even in conservative enterprise situations; of the proliferation of commercial Unixes that Solaris competed against in the 90s, only a few remain, and most of them are weak indeed. Linux gives the user freedoms you don’t get with proprietary, closed choices, and can now boast of a developer ecosystem that pretty much dwarfs that of any closed-source server OS. Even Solaris is now Open Source (or has an OS version), since that’s the only way to compete with Linux.
Second, the commodity Intel box got more and more and more powerful, meaning folks didn’t NEED Sun hardware to do things like run mail and web servers, or even databases, for most applications. Serious hardware just isn’t indicated in 99.9% of situations — and even when it is, Intel architecture boxes have grown up into high-availability tools that cost a fraction of what Sun’s Sparc hardware demanded.
The combination of a free operating system better than Solaris and cheap hardware getting more cost-effective than Sparc has pretty much cut off Sun’s oxygen supply, to steal a phrase.
It’s amusing that Sun’s lasting legacy is Java, but also predictable. Sun realized that for Java to succeed, it needed to be essentially free. Sun makes almost no money from Java, and can’t — if they charged for it, they’d kill it. The era of pay-to-play development environments is just plain over. Java’s still huge, and will likely stay that way for a while, but it’s impossible for Sun to monetize that success. (Even so, the rise of dynamic languages and frameworks will likely mean Java’s time as king of the hill is limited.)
Yay! Police State!
Reason points us to the sad tale of Erasmo Palacios, as reported in the Sun-Times. Basically, it’s yet another tale of gross police misconduct coupled with yet another tale of property seizure for no good reason:
It was Rocio Palacios who first noticed the woman who appeared to need help.
It was 8 a.m. when she and her husband, Erasmo, dropped their 6-year-old daughter off at school and had picked up their 22-year-old daughter to go out for breakfast when they saw the woman waving her arms at 53rd Street and Kedzie Avenue last November.
The Palacioses, of Chicago, claim the woman approached their car, parked outside Manolo’s restaurant, leaned in to the passenger side where Rocio was sitting and asked Erasmo if he wanted oral sex for $20 or sex for $25.
The couple laughed, realizing this wasn’t a woman in distress after all.
But within seconds, Chicago police swarmed the family car, hauling Erasmo Palacios out in handcuffs. He was charged with solicitation of a prostitute
[…]
Eight hours later, Palacios, who has no criminal record, was released from custody. And weeks later, charges against him were dropped.
Attorneys Lonny Ben Ogus and Joe Cavanaugh also want to know what happened to the family’s 1983 Mercedes. It was impounded that November day and, Palacios said, his wife and daughter were even threatened with arrest as they tried to stop police from taking it, as they were left stranded that morning.
The city wants more than $4,700 in towing and storage fees if he wants the car back.
Nice. Go get ’em, Palacios. Police involved in situations like this must be held accountable; Heathen is official in favor of imposing personal liability for this degree of Kafkaesque misconduct.
How to tell if you’re a crystalgazing frootbat
You believe in homeopathy.
Dept. of First Impressions
“Wow, Vista really blows.”
The Onion: Still Winning
Schreiber’s semi-favorable review, which begins in earnest after a six-paragraph preamble comprising a long list of baroquely rendered, seemingly unrelated anecdotes peppered with obscure references, summarizes music as a “solid but uninspired effort.”
“Coming in at an exhausting 7,000 years long, music is weighed down by a few too many mid- tempo tunes, most notably ‘Liebestraume No. 3 in A flat’ by Franz Liszt and ‘Closing Time’ by ’90s alt-rock group Semisonic,” Schreiber wrote. “In the end, though music can be brilliant at times, the whole medium comes off as derivative of Pavement.”
Oh, like there’s any chance he’d be worse than the incumbent
MeFi points out Mercer for President, the best site by an insane candidate we’ve seen yet.
We’d try, but we couldn’t possible beat the BB Gadgets headline
“Cloaca” Art Installation Produces Own Criticism:
WMMNA has a write-up of the horrifying “Cloaca” project, developed by Wim Delvoye, a series of machines that, when fed a slurry of acids, bacteria, and enzymes along with food, produce feces.
HAHAHAHAHA!
Political blogger Tbogg agrees with us that the Michigan-ND game is pointless. We can’t tell where this quote is from, as his link is broken, but it’s a winner:
Who will be the biggest loser of the Fighting Irish-Wolverine game? ABC, which is under contractual agreement to televise the game between two teams who have now lost four in a row dating back to last season, and whose defenses have allowed 37.3 (U-M) and 36.8 (ND) points in their first two games.
What there will be NONE of today on Heathen
Senseless jingoistic 9/11 anniversary navel-gazing. Fuck that.
Dept. of Creepy Milestones
In the wait-you’ve-got-to-be-kidding division, we note that today marks only thirty years since the last execution by guillotine in France. Yep, that’s right: most of you reading now were alive the last time that thing got used.
Bizarre.
SabanWatch: Week 2
Well, it looks like ol’ NickyLou made it past the gauntlet of his first actual SEC game, but don’t celebrate yet: it was perennial SEC football whipping boy Vandy, where the players are actually expected to score 4 digits on the SAT. (The only sadder squad in the region is in Starkville (which is hard to imagine, since MSU is in no way as handicapped by “admission requirements” as Vandy(HDANCN?))). Even so, a win’s a win. Let’s do the math:
Last week we determined that we’d purchased 1.4375 winning points per million after the Tide somehow managed to rout the I-AA Western Carolina team. We reached this figure by taking the margin of victory in that game (46 points) and dividing it by 32, the number of millions of dollars Saban’s contract is worth. This week, our winning score was 24-10, creating a 14 point margin of victory. 46 + 14 is a nice, even 60. 60 / 32 gives us the new Nick Saban Winning Points Per Million Value: 1.8750. We look forward to this reaching more promising levels later in the year.
Up next: a real, ranked squad in the No. 16 Arkansas Razorbacks, followed by No. 23 Georgia on 9/22. Saban doesn’t get another gimmee until late this month, when there’s a 3-week respite: Florida State on 9/29 (not even that much of a gimmee), Houston on 10/06, and Ole Miss on 10/13.
Things we don’t understand this week:
Joe Pa earns encomiums for beating the helpless Irish 31-10, this time with commentary on his “stout D.” Were the sports cognoscenti just not paying attention when then-unranked Georgia Tech kept the Irish out of the end zone entirely last week in their 33-3 rout, while the Lions gave up a TD? How is that “stout D” from a top-20 team? Even so, as we predicted last week, the Lions move up from AP 14/USAT 15 to No. 12 across the board on the “strength” of this win.
Once-mighty Michigan flopped again, losing to Oregon 39-7. They’re quoted as saying, however, that they’re “pretty sure” they can beat the Irish next Saturday in a contest that promises to be an utter waste of pigskin, time, and TV-time. The last time Michigan opened with two losses was 1959, while the Irish have been outscored by 51 points in their first two games. We’re sure it’ll be on TV. Whatever.
Third-Party Contract Oil’s favorite squad — still ranked, for some reason — showed they’re all offense on Saturday by allowing Middle Tennessee State to score 42 points; Louisville required 58 to seal the deal. Put those boys in a game with an SEC defense and we’ll talk, Danno.
This week’s vote for “least relevant televised game” goes to the prime-time contest between powerhouses Rutgers and Navy; Rutgers won, 41-24, and is apparently still ranked. For some reason. See above re: playing a power school.
Speaking of strong schools, what the fuck happened to Auburn? Jesus, people, it’s SOUTH FLORIDA, and you (a) go to OT aand (b) lose? You’re killing us, here. Christ. (Of course, the other side of this is that perhaps it means Saban’s got a good shot at his most important game, but that remains to be seen.)
Oh, and LSU — who routed No. 19 Virginia Tech this week 48-7 — is still only number 2, while the idle Trojans continue to enjoy their top rating. At least some of the votes for USC are defecting; USC was down to 40 first place votes, from 59. LSU picked up the difference.
In case you are stupid
That thing on your shoulders? That’s your head. These things? They are big-ass holes in the ground.
Enjoy.
This is a very bad idea
There is now a device on the market that enables the one to replace your car horn with the MP3 of your choice.
Heh.
Paul Ford is making a difference.
Things we learned at 0600
Even in the TWENTY FIRST CENTURY, there are files so big — say, 15 gigabytes — that they cannot meaningfully be transmitted over the Internet to, say, India.
If there were any truth or beauty in the world, this would be a real commercial
Sure, we stole the line from Reddit, but it’s still good
Everything you could possibly need to know about Second Life in a single paragraph:
Someone on Second Life is offering “tiny, adorable baby unicorns that you can hold and cuddle… but they come with a price. You can only get them by having sex with an adult unicorn located at the bel Highland sim…”
Oh, good. Now the Telcos apparently own the Dept. of Justice
The DoJ has come out against Network Neutrality. This is not good.
So, we’ve been away from Outlook for a while
And we like it that way. In the new job, though, we’ll have to at least be aware of it even if we don’t use it, so in order to facilitate some user migrations, we spooled up a virtual XP box and installed Outlook 2007.
Holy. Crap. This thing is totally broken. Here’s two bits we’ve run into right away:
First, if you go through the setup and elect to create an Exchange account, but get it wrong, you’re in a dead end — Outlook will really, really want to connect to the Exchange server, and if it can’t for whatever reason, it’s going to fall over. We couldn’t find any config files or Outlook folders in our home directory to zap and start over, so we asked the tech. Turns out, to make Outlook ‘start over’, you need to go into the frigging Control Panel, to the Mail option, and delete the bolloxed profile. Then you can start over.
It gets better. If, later, after getting Outlook running without an Exchange account configured, you decide you want to try to add one, you can’t — at least not from inside Outlook. Exchange accounts have to be added through the self-same Control Panel -> Mail -> Profiles mechanism we mentioned above.
Who thought this was a good idea? Is someone at Microsoft just trying to create absurdist, unfriendly, unintuitive, totally b0rked interfaces comprised entirely of Fail? We understand they want to tie everything to Windows so it’s impossible to switch, but come ON, people, the whole rest of the universe understands that a mail program is just a mail program, not something that should need to be managed from our operating system’s byzantine configuration tools. Sheesh.
This is an excellent example of why open tools are better, by the way. With an open tool — not just open source, but any software designed to be flexible and friendly to the user — you can use it while following your own software plan. With a closed, locked-up tool like Outlook, you’re definitely being coerced into following Microsoft’s business plan, which is probably not yours.
A good start
One county in California has abolished the doctrine allowing corporations to be treated as people.
PATRIOT smackdown
NEW YORK — A federal judge struck down a key part of the USA Patriot Act on Thursday in a ruling that defended the need for judicial oversight of laws and bashed Congress for passing a law that makes possible “far-reaching invasions of liberty.”
More:
The ACLU had challenged the law on behalf of an Internet service provider, complaining that the law allowed the FBI to demand records without the kind of court supervision required for other government searches. Under the law, investigators can issue so-called national security letters to entities like Internet service providers and phone companies and demand customers’ phone and Internet records.
In his ruling, [U. S. District Judge Victor] Marrero said much more was at stake than questions about the national security letters.
He said Congress, in the original USA Patriot Act and less so in a 2005 revision, had essentially tried to legislate how the judiciary must review challenges to the law. If done to other bills, they ultimately could all “be styled to make the validation of the law foolproof.”
Noting that the courthouse where he resides is several blocks from the fallen World Trade Center, the judge said the Constitution was designed so that the dangers of any given moment could never justify discarding fundamental individual liberties.
He said when “the judiciary lowers its guard on the Constitution, it opens the door to far-reaching invasions of liberty.”
Regarding the national security letters, he said, Congress crossed its boundaries so dramatically that to let the law stand might turn an innocent legislative step into “the legislative equivalent of breaking and entering, with an ominous free pass to the hijacking of constitutional values.”
Thank GOD someone is paying attention. Perhaps the best part of the article, despite the awkward phrase in re: the role of the judiciary, which we’re pretty sure the judge didn’t botch:
Marrero’s lengthy judicial opinion, akin to an eighth-grade civics lesson, described why the framers of the Constitution created three separate but equal branches of government and delegated to the judiciary to say what the law is and to protect the Constitution and the rights it gives citizens.
Marrero said the constitutional barriers against governmental abuse “may eventually collapse, with consequential diminution of the judiciary’s function, and hence potential dire effects to individual freedoms.”
In that event, he said, the judiciary could become “a mere mouthpiece of the legislature.”
Meatheads, but not the Archie Bunker kind
Photos of women with meat for hair.
Dept. of Topical Onion Awesomeness
For Joy and Boogielips: Woman Overjoyed By Giant Uterine Parasite:
NEW BRIGHTON, MN–Immediately following a physician’s examination for her menstrual cessation, 37-year-old events planner Janice Crowley told reporters Tuesday that she is “ecstatic” with her diagnosis of a rapidly growing intrauterine parasite.
[…] Studies have shown that while the disorder strikes without prejudice across racial, ethnic, and class lines, it bears a very high correlation with the consumption of alcohol at the time of infection. Although there is a low-cost daily medication available that can prevent the harmful symbiote with 99 percent efficacy, many women inexplicably choose not to use it.
[…]
“We’re thinking of naming [the parasite] either Robert or Lisa,” Crowley said. “I just couldn’t be more excited!”
Among the many signs that Crowley’s condition is deteriorating rapidly is a frequent compulsion to consume foods in unorthodox and often revolting combinations.
“For some reason I can’t stop eating olives dipped in chocolate cake frosting,” Crowley said cheerfully. “And the other day I just had to have sardines with butter and jam. Crazy!”
HOWTO make your little girl cry, and possibly scar her for life
Make her a Barbie Electric Chair.
Best. Skull. Evar.
This one is made from melted 1980s metal band cassettes. Rock on!
MMMM, bitter
These films about regret are bitter, but they’re also very funny. Enjoy. (Via MeFi.)
Nice move.
Citing the huge backlash from the early-adopter crowd over the sudden $200 price drop on iPhones, Apple announced today that they were giving all iPhone buyers a $100 Apple-store credit as a goodwill gesture.
You always know that, when you buy something electronic, the price will drop dramatically, and quickly. It’s the nature of the beast. Apple’s step here — which is worth, on paper, nearly $100M US, but will cost them far less — is a grand gesture sure to silence 99% of the grumbling horde. Good choice, Steve.
Breathe with the monkey
It turns out there are far more Trunk Monkey ads than we previously realized. Here’s a compilation (that, oddly, omits the last 2 listed at the link — watch them first, to avoid spoilers). (Thanks, Rob.)
We think a couple of these are ours, actually
Missouri Loves Company provides some One-Liners Overhead While Hunting. Since Mr Missouri is actually a participant in this well-loved tale, we’ll provide a bit of context, just for fun:
- “Madder than a captured Jap”
- We were there for that one. One of the guides had taken a lone hunter to a field that ended up having no avian visitors. A city boy, said hunter was lost and essentially marooned until the guide came back to fetch him. Also, obviously the speaker is a war baby, since we can’t imagine anyone younger having this in their vernacular. Other than us.
- “How do you put the magazine restrictor…”
- That was us. Said game warden was a humorless fuckwit we’d already been warned about, but as we were manifestly complying with all available regulations (i.e., we had precious few birds), we felt comfortable jerking him around. He didn’t like it, but nobody liked him, so there you go.
- “It’s not beer, it’s aiming fluid.”
- We’re pretty sure Mr Missouri said that one, but the memory is necessarily hazy…
- “If you miss the first two shots, the third one is just anger”
- That was us, but we were quoting our dad. He was right. We used this line as partial justification for moving to an over and under a while back, too. Shut up.
Good thing we got Mrs Heathen a new iPod in July
If we’d waited, we would’ve be able to complain about Apple fucking us with fancy NEW Nanos.
Seriously, though, they’re mighty nice. Even nicer are the new iPod Classics, which now come in 80 and 160 gig. It might be getting close to time to finally upgrade the long-in-the-tooth 15 gig, so we get one that’s not all funky and sideways before they stop making the good ones.
(Oh, and if you paid $500 for an iPhone? Sucker. The 8-gig iPhone is now $399, or $200 less than than the intro price. The 4-gig iPhone is no longer available.)
Mmm, literary artifacts
Sutpen’s blog has a great notice up about the original manuscript for On The Road, which will be on display in New York from November til March. It is, as you may know, on a roll of teletype paper; Kerouac fed the roll of paper into his typewriter and didn’t stop until he’d created one of the most influential novels of his generation.
We think we need to road trip.
No pun intended.
Heathen Greatest Hits
Nearly four years ago, we first noted Firefly Press, in Somerville, Mass. It’s come up again over at the aforementioned notebook fetish blog, so we figured we’d point out their fine work again. For what it’s worth, the excellent short film about the letterpress firm is also now on YouTube. (About 5 minutes. Take the time.)
Cool! PaleoPilot!
Check out this find over at Notebookism. It’s basically a Victorian Palm Pilot made out of ivory (natch).
(And it’s still cooler than the Foleo.)
Dept. of Unorthodox Summer Passtimes
BoingBoing shows us how to bake cookies in your car. Amusing note: you can’t visually check for doneness, since the lower car temperature won’t caramelize the sugars and turn the cookies brown.
Dept. of GAAAAAA
Via BoingBoing:
Jennifer Sutton, 23, recently visited her own heart at an exhibition in London. Sutton received a heart transplant and her original ticker is on display as part of the Wellcome Collection’s educational exhibition The Heart.
Palm gets hit with the Cluebat
They announced today that they’ve aborted the Foleo, which is a good idea seeing as how it was sort of a product in search of a market.
Sadly, we’re still pretty sure they’re doomed.
Ian Murdoch is High as a Kite
The Debian-founder-turned-Sun-employee seems to think OpenSolaris will challenge Linux.
Wow. And they say Jobs has a “reality distortion field;” McNealy’s must be amazing. Frankly, we remain baffled about Murdoch joining Sun in the first place. We hope he’s being paid in boatloads of cash, because any sort of equity compensation is a sucker’s bet. Sun continues to appear doomed, doomed, doomed. They made their bones on hardware that nobody wants anymore, and remain in the public light really only because of Java — which, amusingly, cannot be easily monetized. Spending cash and time on Solaris strikes us a just about the last thing they should be doing, and yet, here they are.
Dept. of Painful Wikipedia Discoveries
We’re not sure how we got there, but we’re very disturbed to discover that the actress who played Newt in Aliens is now a 31-year-old California schoolteacher.
Yikes.
Ha!
Doonesbury examines the myth of the fiscally responsible Republican Party.
Dept. of Inadvertent Synchronization Artifacts
Over at the BoingBoing Gadget Blog, they’ve got video of a Russian helicopter shot with some video camera that happened to have a “shutter speed” more or less exactly in sync with the rotation of the main rotor. Result? A chopper flying with an apparently motionless rotor. Neat.
SabanWatch: Week 1
Nicky Lou surprised a few folks last year by leaving the pro coaching ranks and returning to NCAA, but when the deal was made public most saw why: the 8 year, $32 million offer made him the richest coach in college football, which is presumably sufficient motivation to take the hot seat that the top job in Tuscaloosa has become.
Well, here we are in football season once again, and it’s time to measure Saban’s performance. We figure a basic metric might be points per million, defined as “total number of winning points divided by 32” n.b. that we’re avoiding scientific notation by working with millions, not dollars. You’re welcome.
Yesterday Alabama played a creampuff from a lower division: Western Carolina. That the Tide routed them 52-6 shouldn’t surprise anyone, then. Frankly, we’re mildly disappointed that UA fell to this I-AA temptation; we’ve long complained about contender teams playing softies, and this year is no exception. Nobody in the top 25 ought to be able to stay there with one of these gimmee games on the schedule, but then again Alabama probably won’t be a contender this year — they are unranked, and it’s a new coach.
(Of course, some ranked squads played I-AA schools yesterday, and we think poorly of them for it — though at least (e.g.) Penn State and Auburn had the decency to actually win, unlike 5th-ranked Michigan who fell to I-AA Appalachian State.)
(No, LSU playing Mississippi State doesn’t count as a creampuff; it’s a conference game.)
Anyway, back to Saban. The margin of victory here was 52 – 6, or 46 points. Ergo, the Saban PointsPerMillion value currently stands at 46/32, or 1.4375. We’ll keep you updated as the season progresses.
Addendum 1: It will be difficult for the pollsters to insist Notre Dame is worth a damn this year after their 33-3 drubbing at the hands of unranked George Tech yesterday, which warms our hearts. However, expect JoePa’s squad to get an undeserved bump in the rankings after they meet and (probably) beat the Irish next week.
Addendum 2: In the “why can’t they both lose?” department, the only top-25 matchup to be played yesterday saw Cal beat Tennessee 45-31.